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“There is a Conspiracy of Silence Against Me. What Should I Do, Oscar?”“Join...

Oscar Wilde? Augustine Birrell? Lewis Morris? Fictional? Oscar Wilde? Augustine Birrell? Lewis Morris? Fictional? Dear Quote Investigator: There is a popular anecdote about Oscar Wilde that is very...

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The Play Was a Great Success, But the Audience Was a Total Failure

Oscar Wilde? William Collier? Daniel Frohman? George Bernard Shaw? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: I have been involved in several theatrical productions and sometimes the response of an audience...

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You Must Know Your Destination Port If You Wish to Catch A Favorable Wind

Oscar Wilde? Seneca the Younger? Leon Tec? Dear Quote Investigator: Recently, I came across a quotation in a pub in Germany that was credited to Oscar Wilde. Your help in tracing this expression would...

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America Is the Only Country That Went from Barbarism to Decadence Without...

Ogden Nash? George Bernard Shaw? James Agate? La Liberté? Winston Churchill? Henry James? Oscar Wilde? Georges Clemenceau? Dear Quote Investigator: There is a famous humorous saying about the United...

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Absinthe: After the First Glass, You See Things As You Wish They Were

Oscar Wilde? Ada Leverson? Leslie Stokes? Violet Wyndham? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: The alcoholic psychoactive drink absinthe was banned in the United States and many European countries in...

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I Have the Simplest Tastes; I Am Always Satisfied with the Best

Oscar Wilde? Edgar Saltus? Winston Churchill? Randolph Churchill? Lord Birkenhead? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: I have discovered two very similar quotations that are credited to two very...

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Never Put Off Till Tomorrow What You Can Do The Day After Tomorrow Just As Well

Mark Twain? Oscar Wilde? Josh Billings? Spanish Proverb? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: Everyone is guilty of some procrastination.  Even the industrious humorist Mark Twain was credited with a...

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It Is the Mark of a Truly Intelligent Person To Be Moved By Statistics

George Bernard Shaw? Bertrand Russell? Oscar Wilde? John H. Gibbons? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: The following quotation is used by speakers who are planning to project a series of slides that...

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There Are Three Rules for the Writing of a Novel

Somerset Maugham? Oscar Wilde? Mark Twain? Bret Harte? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: With the rapid growth of ebooks it seems that everyone is writing a book. Here is the funniest advice I have...

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Quotation Is a Serviceable Substitute for Wit

Oscar Wilde? Somerset Maugham? George Bernard Shaw? Voltaire? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: I thought you might enjoy the following remark attributed to Oscar Wilde: Quotation is a serviceable...

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Every Time I Smell It, I Shall Be Reminded of You

Oscar Wilde? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: I saw an article on the web about brilliant repartee that listed the “Top 10 Best Comebacks”. One of the response lines was from the famous wit Oscar...

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“I Wish I Had Said That”“You Will, Oscar, You Will”

Oscar Wilde? James McNeill Whistler? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: I would like to learn more about a famous anecdote involving James McNeill Whistler, the painter who is known for his iconic...

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It Is the Best Play I Ever Slept Through

Oscar Wilde? Myron W. Reed? Will Rogers? Charlie Carter? Dear Quote Investigator: Several weeks ago I saw an article with the following humorous title: Why Arianna’s Talk Was the Best I’ve Ever Slept...

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History Does Not Repeat Itself. The Historians Repeat One Another

Max Beerbohm? Rupert Brooke? Philip Guedalla? Oscar Wilde? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: I have heard two distinct, humorous, and antithetical sayings about the composition of history: 1) History...

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Be Yourself. Everyone Else Is Already Taken

Oscar Wilde? Menards? America Ferrera? Apocryphal? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: I have spent hours trying to determine whether Oscar Wilde wrote the following as commonly claimed: Be Yourself....

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You Can’t Use Up Creativity. The More You Use, The More You Have

Maya Angelou? Oscar Wilde? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: Recently on Pinterest and Twitter I have seen the following quotation attributed to the famous wit Oscar Wilde: You can’t use up...

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The Jawbone of an Ass

Oscar Wilde? Lord Paget? Henry Watterson? Apocryphal? Quote Investigator: In modern times a philistine is an uncultured anti-intellectual. In the Bible the Philistine people were enemies of the...

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Briefest Correspondence: Question Mark? Exclamation Mark!

Victor Hugo? Oscar Wilde? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: There is a popular humorous anecdote about an exchange of letters between Victor Hugo and his publisher shortly after the publication of...

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I Would Challenge You To a Battle of Wits, But I See You Are Unarmed

William Shakespeare? Mark Twain? Oscar Wilde? Winston Churchill? Abby Buchanan Longstreet? Frank Fay? Pierre de Roman? Joey Adams? Apocryphal? Dear Quote Investigator: There exists a collection of...

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Bigamy Is Having One Spouse Too Many. Monogamy Is the Same

Erica Jong? Oscar Wilde? Robert Webster Jones? H. L. Mencken? Anonymous? Dear Quote Investigator: As a single person I enjoy the following joke about bigamy. Here are two versions: (1) Bigamy is having...

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